Imagine you find yourself out of shape. You can feel the loose feeling around your waist and the “overhang” on jeans that used to fit. Your energy levels mean you crash to the sofa when you get home and can barely lift a finger.
You are so angry with yourself for getting out of shape and you feel nothing but irritation and contempt toward yourself for allowing such a thing to happen. All those mid-week bottles of wine and take-away…”what was I thinking!”
You decide that enough is enough and you decide to get in shape.
Strangely though when it comes to training, this time around you have grown a love for those gruelling intervals sessions but you just can’t seem to crack your nutrition.
The really hard punishing workouts get a big thumbs up.
The beneficial nutrition, downtime, nourishment and doing things you enjoy a big thumbs down.
You put the hard yards in but then you just seem to self-sabotage!
Psychology today describes “The most common self-sabotaging behaviours are procrastination, self-medication with drugs or alcohol and comfort eating”
If any of these behaviours are common to you, I hope by reading this you might find some clues on where to look to unpick them and finally crack your goals.
So if you are hard on yourself or you self-sabotage how can you fix this? Dr Kristin Neff has developed an approach that I think is very effective.
Dr Kristin Neff Phd on her site self-compassion.org describes the concept of self compassion;
“Instead of mercilessly judging and criticizing yourself for various inadequacies or shortcomings, self-compassion means you are kind and understanding when confronted with personal failings”
She continues “You may try to change in ways that allow you to be more healthy and happy, but this is done because you care about yourself, not because you are worthless or unacceptable as you are.”
In my experience as a coach people are more successful in creating change when they decide they are doing it to benefit themselves rather than because they consider themselves “puny” “disgusting” “ridiculously fat” or “not good enough for my age” to quote only a few things we have heard at Storm.
You can take their self compassion quiz here (I took it and failed miserably FYI)
The overly compassionate coach
So you hire a coach. They tell you they can help you achieve your goals and you get started. You train your arse off when you are with them but upon hearing about how hard you have it at work and at home they eagerly excuse your comfort eating and brush it under the carpet. They would hate to have an awkward conversation after all as they like you and they want you to like them.
The zero compassion coach
In contrast, hire a coach with zero compassion and they provide a super strict and highly restrictive diet plan that is nearly impossible to follow with your existing work and family commitments. Then berate you when you don’t follow it by the letter. There will be no adjustments to account for travel, working late or allowing a social life. You will follow the plan or leave with the knowledge that you have again failed and you were right all along… you are not good enough😉
The compassion-o-meter coach
Maybe the answer lies in a coach who is able to turn up or turn down their compassion-o-meter.
There are times where we all need somebody to lend an ear to our difficult circumstances. There are also times where we need somebody to tell us that unless we take action we will continue to be stuck.
A good coach will listen intently to your unique situation and create a plan that will work for you around your circumstances.
They will also be able to have those difficult conversations and ultimately keep you accountable to what you really want.
These are the coaches that will get you results that last.
These are the coaches you’ll find at Storm.
Start Your Fitness Journey Today
Book your complimentary personal planning session now
✔ In depth posture and movement analysis
✔ Full breakdown of your training history
✔ Our opportunity to fully understand your lifestyle
✔ In depth discussion on your goals and motivation
✔ We’ll take your starting measurements (optional)
✔ Jointly we’ll create your training and nutrition roadmap
✔ We’ll find the best package for you, your budget and your goal
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